Guest Blogger :: Shannon

My maid of honor felt ill-equipped when fulfilling her MOH duties. Yes, let’s be real, they are duties, fun or not. As the bridal shower & bachelorette party dates approached, my MOH admitted, "I’ve never been an MOH before; I don’t know where to start." The first thing I thought was "Hello! Ask around, brainstorm with other bridesmaids…something!"

Was I really a bridezilla?? YES!

Two months after the wedding, I finally asked her, "How could I have helped you feel more prepared as my MOH?" It took seconds for us to come up with something so simple…I thought back to a book given to me for wedding planning that was left untouched. After all, I had a wedding planner, so who needed it, right? 

A bridesmaid or MOH survival guide would have been the perfect compliment to an already creative friend; providing organization, timelines, and the support she may have needed to make a special time perfect.

My now veteran MOH and I looked up some potential front-runners. The Quintessential Wedding Maid of Honor or The Everything Bridesmaid Book.

Check these and more on www.amazon.com for as little as $9.95 to support your MOH in supporting YOU!

Guest Blogger, Shannon Williams, and her wife are sharing with us their journey of planning their same-sex wedding and what it's like to be married. Read more about them here.

Guest Blogger :: Shannon

Perhaps solidifying a wedding date (and wedding dress shopping swiftly approaching) compelled me to lose an average of 1.6 pounds per week in the last year of my life. (Maybe.)

I remember about elevendy-billion reasons to shed these 115 pounds gained since 2001, and somehow they gelled:

• Wondering people’s thoughts: “She would be so pretty if she just lost that weight.”
• Dreading contact with high school alumni as the athlete who "let herself go."
• Proving to my brother that there was more to me than fat.
• Making that “UUGGHH” noise when tying my shoes or standing up.
• Wondering if blood tests would reveal I have Type II Diabetes, or worse.
• Eating breakfast with visions of tomorrow’s dinner dancing in my head.
• Worrying I wouldn’t be able to keep up with the family I’ve always dreamed of.
• My fiancée steadily losing weight while I could barely squeeze in to my size 22’s.
• Being publicly addressed as “hey fat girl!,” as some guy I’ve never met wins macho-points with his buddies (hi-fives & laughter).
• Holding back painful tears as my bestie sprints towards a truck of snickering guys hoping to redeem a fun night and rescue my spirit after the driver yells, “Move you fat b**ch!” 

What’s worse? The “B-word”, or the “F-word”…FAT!

I constantly joked I had “Reverse Body Dismorphic Disorder” thinking “I look gooood...” then seeing the photos. “Do I really look like that?? Gross!”

I was kidding myself, rationalizing my failed weight loss attempts.

“I don’t know why I’m not losing weight. I eat tons of vegetables, I don’t drink soda, I rarely eat candy or fast food, and there’s really nothing else I can restrict.”

Although I don’t recall having those thoughts while inhaling a Red Robin Blue Ribbon Burger furnished with all-you-can-eat fries dunked in ranch dressing.

I’ve changed. I’m happy. I’m ready to walk down that aisle with my once-lost confident glow intact and wait for my almost-wife to marry me.

Here I am, 82 pounds lighter, changed, happy, and eagerly anticipating that walk down the aisle in my dress, while I wait for my almost-wife to marry me.

Photo courtesy of FABuLIST photographer :: Largo Photography

Guest Blogger, Shannon Williams and her fiancée are sharing with us their journey of planning their same-sex wedding. Read more about them here.

Guest Blogger :: Shannon Williams

After reading Maiden Names and Married Names, a post from Drew (a fellow Mrster.com blogger), I wanted to explore the process of changing my last name to Cárdenas. My fiancée, Erika, asked me to marry her, and I am honored to take her last name. I am confident that when we have children our family will feel a natural connection to each other, establish more recognition in this world that we are a traditional family, and are not choosing an “alternative life style” if we share a family name. I searched the county, state, and numerous “how to” sites and then came across this article, Gay Couple: Judge Barred Name Change . In it, a lesbian couple in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania submit a petition to change the last name of their 5-year-old son to that of his mother's partner of three years. 

Picture Courtesy of My Fox Philly

Permission denied! Words from the “honorable” judge: “It wasn’t in the boy’s best interest.” And, “name changes should be granted based on good sense, common decency and fairness." 

Submitting my petition requires a response to “I request that the current name of Shannon Elizabeth Williams be changed to Shannon Elizabeth Cárdenas for the following reasons,” followed by three blank lines that beckon my justification. I wonder if the Arizona judge will feel my request depicts common sense, decency and fairness. It appears the legal system may feel conflicted in receiving genuine, truthful responses, but here is mine:

Because I deserve to have the last name of my wife who loves me, adores me, will respect me always, and wants to live the rest of this wonderfully chaotic life…with me.

The mother's partner in the above article sadly alleged, "If she (her partner) would have walked in there and not mentioned me at all, the name change probably would have been granted." 

Perhaps the AZ judge that reviews my petition will say "PERMISSION GRANTED." Or perhaps I too will be faced with the alternate, and have to make something up.

Guest Blogger, Shannon Williams and her fiancée are sharing with us their journey of planning their same-sex wedding. Read more about them here.

Tags :: Modern Wedding Traditions, Personal Perspective, Name Changes, Real Stories, Political Perspective, Media.